Yep. These fuckers, they are still eating things. I admit, I have been known to perhaps bait them with a screaming monkey now and again:
But these next two, well these two were entirely the fault of the child, who likes to, erm, play with the dogs when she should be sleeping. And by play, I mean “taunt them with toys until they want nothing more than to eat out the eyes the second she falls asleep”:
Before we found him, stuffed in the box spring, (Yes, the one they ate the fabric off of the first time) We found his eyes.
Man: Hey, um, why is there an eye on the floor right here?
Me: Argh! Fuckers!
Fuckers: We’re going to casually walk behind the couch for a minute. Not sure what we did, but it’s best to look innocent.
Fuckers: It could have been worse. See:
Fuckers: We could have eaten his ass and his eyes.
Me: This is me, NOT GIVING YOU A MILKBONE. BAD DOGS!
At this point they both shrugged, and muttered something about being full already anyway. On account of whatever this was, I assume:
and a side of carpet: