Monthly Archives: December 2008

I’m Making No Resolutions, So Stop Asking.

I have decided that I am not  doing this this year.  I have, admittedly, participated in this ritual in the past. But not this year. Not doing it.

You see, while its all well and good to set goals for one’s self, everyone knows that resolutions don’t work. They just don’t. It’s become a huge running joke.

Even though you know it is a joke, you are left feeling crappy because you didn’t quit smoking, couldn’t manage to lose ten pounds, and continued to sleep with strangers after too many shots of jager, even though you resolved not to.

So, this year, the only thing I am resolving  is not to set unrealistic goals for myself.  I’m going to live through 2009 and count myself lucky that I have. I am not going to let myself fell shitty if I can’t get in shape or stomp out my Cheeto addiction.

As for 2008 being over, well, good riddance I say.

Hurrah.  Let the 2008 reminiscing begin. Here are some of my favorite images from the last year:

My family

My three favorite people.

Starting school

The first day of Kindergarten for Kid


Halloween at Disney

New Puppy!

A new member of our family.

I drove in snow, and did not die.

I drove in snow, and did not die.

At least I got to START the year with them.

At least I got to START the year with them.


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I’m a Klutz, Okay?

I hear people all the time, well, O.K, not hear, exactly, since I don’t actually talk to people in real life, but I see people all the time, talking about how clumsy they are.

You are not clumsy.

No. You are not clumsy. You may bump into things occasionally, or whatever. Fine. I grant you that. But, in a contest of who is the biggest klutz? I win.

What’s that you say? You would like me to elaborate? You would like me to share with you all those embarrassing stories of things I have done to myself over the years that prove just how accident prone I am? Why, sure! Anything for my readers.

First: I broke my ass.

Yes. I.  Broke. My.  Ass. And not doing any kind of cool extreme gymnastics or anything. I broke my ass taking out the trash.  Granted, I was drunk, and I was wearing boots with four inch heels, but still. I broke my ass. When I finally got over the embarrassment,  and went to get an x-ray, two days later, the doctor showed my, right on the big light box, how broken my ass really was.

As a side note, this was a few days before my wedding.  Wearing a wedding gown and sitting on a ‘roid pillow. Hot.

Oh, well, you think,  anyone can break their tailbone. Give us more.

I closed my hand in the garage door. Flattened three fingers.

Then about a week later, I dropped a five gallon bucket of paint on one toe.

When I only walk into, stub my toe on, and bruise my hips bumping into things,  I consider it a good day.

Just this week alone, I grated my thumb in a cheese grater and spilled boiling water on myself.

I win!

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Who knew?

Spending four straight days of quality time alone with the family, when you are all varying degrees of sick, and have absolutely nothing to do is enough to drive a person nuts. Not me, mind you, but, him.

I’m used to being stuck in the house, and perfectly capable of entertaining myself or spending my downtime screwing around online. I am pretty content to do nothing, especially when I have the flu from hell and am leaking gallons of green snot. Yum!

He, however, is not. He is bored.when he is not working, he has no clue what to do with himself. And so he paces and wanders and is completely restless and unable to relax.

And I have been too sick to entertain him. Every project he has tried to start has failed for some random reason. His drill died. His cordless screwdriver died. And then his car battery died. And he was just thrilled. And a joy to be around.

Even the kid is looking forward to going back to school already, and she has another week or so of vacation left. We love her and all, but man, she talks a lot. We DO  try to do stuff with her:

Geek in Training

Geek in Training

Thank the gods for the Wii. Seriously. We have used it every day so far. The kid’s favorites so far are skiing and running, and I enjoy the step aerobics and hula hooping. We are also playing lots of tennis and bowling, together. He is even doing yoga. This thing is freaking awesome!img_3554

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The End

Eighth Night

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I’m late

Night SixNight Seven

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Fifth Night


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Ok. I’m officially bored. Despite my attempts to distract myself by tormenting the dogs, and my perusing of random blogs and listening to punkrockxmas tunes and very bad radio Hanukkah, I have failed to find anything amusing to do.

I even made latkes, and while grating my thumb WAS a great way to kill an hour,  what with all the blood and crying and laughter, (That last one was his) I’m still incredibly bored. And sick.  Did I mention I was sick?

Sigh. OK. Done whining, Merry Chistmas and stuff. Go play with your presents now. I’m gonna go hula hoop

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