Monthly Archives: March 2009

An Addendum:

1-No, I do not know yet if they are fraternal or identical. They may not be able to tell. As of now, they have two sacs, which is very good. Not sure on how many placentas. They  both have visible, strong heartbeats. I’m probably 7/8 weeks. I go back in two weeks to measure again.

2- Yes. I’m high risk now. Bring on the panic.

3- Dad took it better than I expected. We are both still in shock though. Mostly excited, but worrying about how we are going to manage financially.  Especially with the news that my other kids may be here for part of the summer. (Oh, I didn’t mention that yet? I’ll get to it soon. Yay to the nth degree! But also, requires several thousand bucks we don’t really have.)

4- How am I? I’m thrilled, and amazed, and very happy for the confirmation that I am not, in fact, crazy.  I’ve been having dreams of twin boys since my first pregnancy. I had a dream two days ago where they did an ultrasound and saw two babies. Then it happened, and it was surreal.

5- Yes. The kid knows. She doesn’t really grasp it yet, but she knows. I know some people avoid telling their kids in case something happens, but if something were to happen, she would probably notice, and I don’t feel that she needs to be shielded from it.

6- Yes, I am aware of how hard/tiring/exhausting/etc it will be. Trust me, it’s crossed my mind.

7- Yes, I’m also aware that this means I will now be a mother of five. Five!!

8- A few weeks ago, The man asked me if it was normal to be as big as I am, as early as I am. After I stabbed him in the leg with my fork, I told him it was probably because this was my fourth pregnancy. Turns out, it’s because it’s my fourth and fifth. The fact is, I feel bigger- my uterus feels huge! I’m extremely tired, dizzy and nauseated. Much more so than in any previous pregnancy. I’m also swollen and gaining weight fast. Which is all apparently normal and makes me feel much better.

9- No. We Have no names yet. But here’s a list of things we probably won’t pick:

  • Taylor and Tyler
  • Isaac and Isaiah
  • Ethan and Evan
  • Christopher and Christian
  • Jayden and Jaylen
  • Ella and Emma
  • Kayla and Kyla
  • Megan and Morgan
  • Mia and Mya

(Though I kind of like Ethan and Evan) Our letters are probably going to be E and M.

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Dear Internets: Holy shit.

img_4171This says it all, I think.

For those of youthat have no idea what it means… it means I’m FREAKING OUT ABOUT NOW.

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So…

I’ve spent days crying about how I look in my wedding pictures. (Wow, it feels weird to say that. Wedding pictures. Yay!)

I partially blame hormones. For the crying part. For the other part-well, yes- I’m pregnant. And bloated and generally bleh. Can’t exercise, can barely get out of bed. So… I’m huge. And…  Not happy with myself physically right now. Or at least, I wasn’t until I really thought about it.

See, I’m not even supposed to be able to gain weight. Because of the sick. Drastic weight loss is one of the side effects, that I will inevitably get. But, you know what? Once I do, I won’t be able to support a pregnancy. Because it will mean I am no longer absorbing nutrients the way I should.  So if being huge means I get to have a healthy baby, then I’ve decided I’m okay with it for now.

I admit though, It made me feel a little odd, especially knowing that hundreds of people clicked over from GGC to see my wedding photos because of this post.

Which, is awesome, but it’s also a little weird. I want to subtitle every picture with “I’m not really this fat.”  I look at the pictures and it doesn’t even feel like I’m looking at me.

It’s… weird.

So, I’m just going to focus on the reason. And ignore pictures of myself for the next several months.

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Words.

I’m back! With words! Well…maybe.

Aside from being totally swamped with wedding stuff, I’ve also been functioning on a much lower dose of medication and an insufficient amount of caffeine.

Honestly, I can barely get out of bed, let alone write.

But I want to, need to, share this with you.

Saturday was amazing. It really was. C came over early and helped with the decorating, bearing bunches of flowers and glass for centerpieces.

The geek toys got kicked off the mantle for this occasion.Even the kid helped decorate…

"Mommy and Moo's wedding"

H, N and M came bearing food and drinks: Food and flowers.More food and flowers

These are the yummiest things ever.And of course, B made the cake of awesomeness:

Mmmm cake.That’s my bouquet, made by me, from roses my mother sent me.

My dress, was actually a prom dress, black, ( as many people have commented on) to hide the growing belly. I got dressed, with the kid, as E followed me around and took amazing photos.

getting dressedThe officiant, who was awesome, and fast, ( and found by H)  came to say hello before I walked out to meet my groom,

I knew i'd find a use for that thing.It’s amazing what you can do with sheets and some paper lanterns from the dollar bin at Michaels.

It was really windy.

ack!But I made it.

yay!And then we partied! I wish I could show you the incredible people who helped make this happen.

And to, make it all just that much more amazing, a bunch of them pitched in to get us a hotel room next weekend for our “honeymoon”.  I couldn’t ask for a better wedding, or a better group of friends.

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Pictures:

Pinning on the flowersgetting readyfixing the veilFlower girlCeremonythe kissthe ringsAfterI'm pregnant, what do you want?The toastThe awesome cake Hover over pictures. Words later, promise.

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It’s been an Amazing Month.

As you may have noticed, I have a lot going on in my world right now.

We went from finding out we were pregnant and deciding to get married in the courthouse to having an amazing wedding here this Saturday!

And this would not be possible without the help of some incredible, awesome amazing women and their families. These are people I met only a few short years ago, when I moved to the neighborhood and found their playgroup online. It’s a rather large group, but a bunch of us clicked right away, having kids that were around the same age, and having similar personalities and interests. Some of them have known each other since childhood, while others are military wives who were just passing through this town.

We have been meeting regularly, having mom’s nights, and coffee dates and getting the kids together over here or at parks for play-dates and parties. And we email back and forth on our online group.

A few short weeks ago, I tagged on to a group email a P.S saying, “By the way, I’m pregnant and getting married!”

“When? Where?” they asked.

“Oh we are just going to the courthouse. We don’t have a lot of money and what we do have, well, we need to save it for the baby. And, well, I need insurance, so we are just going to get it done asap!”

“No!” said one friend. ” You guys have to do something! It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money.”

“It’s okay,” I replied. “It’s no big deal”.

“No, really! We should at least have a party!”

“I can make a cake!” another chimed in!

“I’ll take pictures!” Said someone else!

“I can cook something!”

And from there, it just took on a life of it’s own. We got rings-which we ere doing anyway- And we paid someone to come officiate. And bought a dress. (Though someone offered to let me borrow theirs, and another offered to rip up and alter hers completely to fit me.)

And everything else is…done.

Everyone is bringing food. And drinks. And plates and napkins. And music. And a cake. Sending out e-invitations. And taking pictures. And coming over to help decorate. And helping me find a pretty dress within my limited budget.

I’m embarrassed that we can’t do this on our own, I said at one point.

Everyone replied: Don’t be. Everyone is struggling right now. But, this, this is what friends are for. You have opened your home to us all more times that I can count. We want to do this for you. Let us do this for you.

And so I am. We are. I love you guys. You are incredible. I am so lucky and blessed in this moment.

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Getting all those awkward questions out of the way early so you can all judge me and we can go on with our lives.

First up: Yes. I will continue to take my medication as needed throughout the pregnancy.  It’s more dangerous for the baby and if I don’t take the meds, since they control what nutrients I absorb and my blood pressure (And I had Pre-Eclampsia twice so my BP needs to be very much controlled.). My doctors all know what I am taking and why and have assured me that nothing I am taking is likely in any way to cause any birth defects or other serious problems.  There are some risks, but I am taking steps to minimize them.

Second: Not breastfeeding. Physically, I can’t, I have never been able to do it, and even if I could, well,  see medication comment above. I assure you, none of my non-breastfed other children suffered any ill consequences from this lack. Formula is not child abuse.

Third: If it’s a boy, it will be a Jewish Boy. And therefore will be circumcised in a public, catered, ceremonial kind of way. We’d be doing it, and having a party to celebrate it.  I have no problems with this, though I might have chosen differently had the situation been different. It’s not, and I’m fine with it.

I’m putting this all out there nice and early, because I know these are all topics people feel very strongly about, and lots of new people are reading lately.

I understand if these are not the choices you would have made, or would make in my position. That’s fine. Everyone does what is best under their own particular set of circumstances. You are free to say you would do things differently.

However-If you want to judge and hate me for these choices, then the sooner I mention them, the sooner you can decide to stop reading and go away.

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