Welcome to the wonderful world of “Shit the animals in my life have eaten.”This week
I’m sharing this with you because it is much better than telling you about my morning, which consisted of this:
And then an awesome hour of me holding my breath and trying not to simultaneously puke and shit myself. I know it sounds like a super fun night in some circles but trust me, this was anything but.
Anyway, on to the beasts. They may look innocent, but as we all know, looks can deceive.
Don’t buy how peaceful they all appear, for every single one of them is guilty.
Consider, exhibit A:
One day the big one, well, she just decided to eat the wall. For no apparent reason it seems, other than the fact that it was there.
And then there was the bed. We caught her laying on her back, all four feet in the air, with her head under the bed, just.. eating the box spring. WTF!?!
I think the most random thing they have eaten so far is the vent on the outside of the house:
There was once a hard plastic shield over this… we have no clue what prompted her to stand there and chew this off the side of the house.
Anyway, aside from my network cable,
…Toys are the favorite, hands down. We have to generally throw those away before the kid sees them and we are forced to hold little depressing toy funerals while the child weeps, so there not much photo evidence left. However, some are simply too good to toss. Witness, Princess Leia, minus her arms and feet.
Also, lest you think the cat was innocent, she has a thing for eating the feet, tails and heads off any of the millions of squishy bug toys the child brings into the house.
And then throwing up feet and heads in random places. Yum.
That is all.
Pandemonium 