I’ve spent days crying about how I look in my wedding pictures. (Wow, it feels weird to say that. Wedding pictures. Yay!)
I partially blame hormones. For the crying part. For the other part-well, yes- I’m pregnant. And bloated and generally bleh. Can’t exercise, can barely get out of bed. So… I’m huge. And… Not happy with myself physically right now. Or at least, I wasn’t until I really thought about it.
See, I’m not even supposed to be able to gain weight. Because of the sick. Drastic weight loss is one of the side effects, that I will inevitably get. But, you know what? Once I do, I won’t be able to support a pregnancy. Because it will mean I am no longer absorbing nutrients the way I should. So if being huge means I get to have a healthy baby, then I’ve decided I’m okay with it for now.
Which, is awesome, but it’s also a little weird. I want to subtitle every picture with “I’m not really this fat.” I look at the pictures and it doesn’t even feel like I’m looking at me.
So, I’m just going to focus on the reason. And ignore pictures of myself for the next several months.