Want: Morbid Toys For Me.

Hover-Snark enabled. mouse over pictures for random stupid comments.

I know, it’s been so long since I have wanted stuff, and now all you are getting is weird toys for adults. Sorry. I can’t resist.

First up, I need this bear. I don’t know who invented him, or why, but apparently there’s a whole line of gloomy bears in all different colors and sizes. Yes. Really.

I’ll stick with the traditional goth-black one, with the inexplicably bleeding mouth and claws, though.

gloomy-bearAfter my gloomy bear is done asserting his dominance over the rest of my stuffed animals, (Including the Goomba, who is apparently a pussy anyway) I will set him in a place of honor on the dresser, next to this guy:

cardboard-skullI shall call him Fred.

And, during the day, when no one else is around,  I will stage full-scale battles between the kids’ Playmobil Pirates and MY super-cool skeleton pirates, who, by virtue of being skeletons, and therefore already dead, will always come out victorious.

Ninja's would kick their bony asses. I like how they all appear to be shrugging, but with weapons. These awesome guys are finger puppets too, so they are going to be twice as fun, though I’d need a set for each hand. Or perhaps, a set of ninjas for the other hand. Hmmn…

Moving right along.

ac4a_dismember_me_plush_zombie_combo2How can you not want to cuddle him? Seriously. there are no words to express my amusement here. Thinkgeek has done it again.

Last, but most certainly not least, what girl doesn’t need a “Frogmen V.S. a Giant Octopus!” set? Giant Radioactive Octopus, even. He even freaking glows in the dark.


How fucking cool is that?

As always, click the shamelessly stolen borrowed pictures to go buy stuff.


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