I was sitting in a doctors office today. Filled with people, I sat alone yet not, thoughts wandering in and out. One elderly man sat with a rounded belly as though extremely pregnant, skin peeling off one arm. He was dozing in and out of consciousness, or sleep, I don’t know. But, he’d startle awake, and look at me and smile, and make an innocuous comment, every so often.  Another man came in, perhaps even a boy, obviously mentally handicapped. He sat next to me, leaning close to smell my hair, as I willed myself not to recoil out of instinct. The man who had come with him, finished at the counter, sharply barked at him to come sit nearby, and he left my side. A while later an older woman came in and sat with them. I watched as she touched his cheek affectionately. Smiled at him with such love.

Part of me sees the beauty in these people, in all people, that is so ignored in our culture.  I want to capture it somehow and show you. I want to keep it in a box.

And part of me feels like an asshole.


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